Day 100: September's Goals Are a Bust!

Today is September 30, 2010.  It is the last day of September, almost the conclusion of week 15 of this journey and the last week of this term in school.

At the beginning of this month, my goal was to be able to jog a 13 minute mile, jog 4 miles in under an hour, complete 45 hills in 45 minutes and finally weigh under 300lbs.  Looking at these goals and comparing them to were I am right now makes me want to say “SCREW GOALS, goals are for the birds” (LOL)!  After saying that and walking off the frustration of not actually accomplishing the set goals for this month, I’ve gotta stop and do inventory of each goal, evaluate what worked, what didn’t work and what I can do to change things around so that I get my desired results. 

Where am I know

13 minute mile

Although I didn’t get to a 13 minute mile consistently, I can do a solid 15 minute mile consistently (not just once in a blue moon).  So anytime I get out on the track or treadmill my slowest mile is 15 minutes.  If I really put a little extra pep in my step, I can get a 13 minute mile in, but it is not consistent so that’s why I don’t feel like this goal has been accomplished.

Jog 4 miles in under an hour

To me I can’t cross this goal off as accomplished because although I can do a combination of walking/jogging and surpass 4 miles in under an hour, I’m not solely jogging the 4 miles.  Between walking and jogging I can do just under 5 miles in an hour, but it’s still not there yet.

45 Hills in 45 minutes

Yeah, I’m no where close to this.  I think that I only did hills a hand full of times this month.  The most that I was able to get in was 25 hills and I felt like that was the hardest thing that I’ve ever done in my entire life (yeah that’s an exaggeration, but that’s how it felt at the time)!  

Weigh under 300lbs.

I know the phrase that a lady does not say how much she weighs, but I don’t care.  I’m 10lbs. away from accomplishing that goal.  At first I felt SUPER bad that I didn’t loose the last 10lbs. to say "Yes, I did it", but then I had to say to myself, “Rochelle, seriously, calm down!”  I’m at a weight that I was at like 10 years ago.  I can do things now physically that I’ve NEVER done!  Yo, (although it’s not visible to the naked eye, LOL) my muscles are cut like Super-Man, but show like Wonder-Woman’s (very lady like).  

So was September a complete wash out - Heck NO!  Yeah none of my goals were totally reached but I’m still a lot further along than when I started.  Without goals, you have no real tangible benchmark to compare where you were, where you are and where you are going.  These goals are helping me to get to where I’m going.  Do you know where I’m going?  I’m training to cross the finish line of the Marine Corp. Marathon in 2011, that’s where I’m going.  I don’t care who believe’s, I don’t care who supports, I don’t even care who jokes me - that’s where I’m going.  

I’m walking, running, jogging, crying, cursing, laughing, hurting, surviving and enduring on this journey of training the athlete within ME that will run a marathon next year.  As September concludes, I’m excited about October!  It’s time to go hard folks because I’m not ready to go home. 

Day 89: Week 14

This week is week 14 and I've decided that I'm going back to "2aDays".  I feel like I feel better when I do them, I think better, I just function better.  Yeah, it's totally harder and requires major down/rest time but I've been feeling sort of lazy and out of sorts these past few days.

Oh yeah, tomorrow morning I'm going to do something new, something that I've never done - instead of my normal "Track Date" at 6am, I'm going to have "Neighborhood Time".  That's where I'll walk/jog/run on a route within my neighborhood/community verses on the Track or Treadmill.  I feel like this will help me to train for an actual marathon since they happen on the street as well, verses a Track or Treadmill.  I'm actually pretty scared because people will see me.  Yeah, people see me on the track, but this is different.  My neighbors will see me, people driving to work will see me, people on the metro bus will see me, people drinking their morning coffee will see me, etc.  I know..I know, I'm sort of absorbed with the idea of people looking at me or watching me, but I don't want to look like a goober.  But, looking like a goober or not, this is something that I'm not just trying, I'm doing this.

Week 14 will be a week of "2aDays", increased weights, no - meat, bread or sweets and 30 miles of walking/jogging.  It's going to be a rough week, will you pray with me (LOL, but I'm serious)?

Day 86: So Amped

I didn't go to Track Date again this morning.  I actually woke up, but made myself go back to sleep.  I got up and finished a few projects, spent some time with an old friend who had a baby and then I went to the gym.

It's been a minute since I've taken any class and as a result, Body Pump and Body Attack were killers this afternoon.  Like seriously....I thought that I was going to die and be laid out on the floor.  But at the end of the classes I felt absolutely great, tired, but great.  I went into the locker room to weigh myself and I am 10lbs away from my goal this month.  I don't know, when I saw the number, I almost jumped up and clicked my heels together like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz when she wanted to go home.

It feels good to work HARD at something and you see that there are positive results.  This is such a Beyond, Beyond moment for me.  If you only knew......if you only knew.  I'm not looking behind at my past anymore, I'm so excited about the future!

Day 85: The Choice

So I've been feeling like I need some extra motivation to keep pressing through this fog/funky place that I'm at right now.  There is a song that keeps speaking to me.  The song is by Damita Hadden called, 'No Looking Back' and the words really speak volumes - read um:

Verse 1
I am leaving this place now
Letting go of all my fears
Saying good-bye to the memories I hold dear
I can finally breath again
It's a new day
Fair well past
As I close this chapter I set free at last

Chorus
I made up my mind
There's no turning back
The past is behind me
There's no looking back
I'm looking forward not behind
I've made a decision
I give you my life

Verse 2
Every step I take is new
I found courage to go on
Though its rough sometimes
I still have to be strong
I may have to walk alone
But the One who lives inside me
Is always there to comfort and to guide

Chorus

Verse 3
I can see the sun breaking through the clouds
Lifting my hands cause I'm all right now
I can shout about it
I can laugh about it
I can talk about it

Chorus

Aren't those words a great declaration of the decision that I've made in my life??  I LOVE MUSIC!!  It so speaks to my soul.   Here's what I've got to get better with - when I'm tired or frustrated with life, not to revert back to previous ways of handling  adverse situations.  With everyday, every hour, every minute, every second, I've got to choose what I'm going to embrace.  We all have a choice in everything that we do.  A choice to move forward and a choice to be stuck.  A choice to press forward and a choice to quit.  At the end of the day our choices determine how far we go.....I'm choosing life and the future, what are you choosing?

Day 84: Ok, I'm Tired

Yo, I'm tired and feel like I'm lacking the necessary motivation needed.  All I want to do is eat and sleep.  This morning I slept instead of going to Track Date.  This afternoon while others were working out and taking classes, I stood on the wall and looked at everyone while they worked out.  I did end up getting on the bike and I pushed to ride for 12 miles in 45 minutes.  I wanted to stop at 10 minutes in, but I kept going.  It's weird because I really was going to turn the machine off, but I kept it moving even though I didn't want to.  Maybe I'm more motivated than I thought.

Any who, I'm done, I'm going to bed now.

Day 83: Week 13

Week 13....Week 13....WEEK 13!!!!!

I actually don't know what to say honestly.  I am at a loss for words to use to describe this overall experience - which is an amazing feat.  Before I go into my goals and different things like that, I must say, "I CAN SEE IT".  When I started this journey, I had to keep saying what I wanted to do to sort of convince myself that I would actually run a marathon, oh but now, instead of only saying it, I can actually see it too.  Through the hurt hips, hamstring, feet, everything.....I can actually see myself crossing the finish line of a 26 mile race and not even be the last person (finishing is more important than time, but I can even see a faster time).  

Weeks 11 and 12 were pretty hard and I feel like I've slacked off my running pattern/routine and meal plans, but this morning I tweeted something that I am going to apply to this week.  I said, "I am declaring it, no matter how my reality looks right now, I can't allow the look of things to dictate my perspective of things".  Right now things look hard and impossible, but even though it is hard, this is something that I AM  making happen.   I will drink my water.  I will workout everyday (well minus today).  I will push myself to go further each day than I did the day before.  I will continue to blog this journey (even thought I've been horrible at blogging each day).  I will work hard and not engage in quitter thoughts and actions.  

Sometimes you have to encourage yourself and that's what I'm doing because I know that I CAN do all things through Christ who strengthens me. God wants us to be healthy and whole both spiritually, emotionally and physically and that is what I am choosing to be.

Day 79: Loose Fat

I'm just getting in from the gym and I feel a little blown.  I really worked out my arms and legs today but here's the kicker.....instead of nice lean muscle, all u see is a boat load of fat.  But it's not even tight fat, it's loose fat!  You can FEEL that the muscle in my arms and legs are really on point, but you can't SEE it!  It's like something is going on on the inside, but has not manifested to the outside yet.  Yeah.....yeah, I know you can't rush the process, but it still sucks!

Oh well......I'll keep working out and transforming into an Athlete and one day, the world will see!

Day 78: Going Hard but very sore

This morning I actually made it to Track Date, but it was very hard to jog.  I ended up walking a straight and jogging a curve.  I did do a total of 3.26 miles, but it was hard.  So after I finished I had to hurry to FedEx Kinko's to get something cut, then home to change and get ready for work since it was Pastor's Staff Meeting and our department was responsible for it this month.

I don't know what it was, but by the time I got to work, my hips started hurting so bad that I felt like I couldn't walk anymore.  Sometimes you gotta push past your feelings because I had responsibilities at work that needed to be taken care of.  After work I met a friend at hhgreg and saw someone that totally BLEW my life and night.  So at first I was just going to go home and go to bed, but after sitting in the car for an hour or so, I said to myself, "NOPE, THIS IS NOT AN OPTION!"  I went to the gym and put it in and you know what......my hips feel so much better!

So now I sit here feeling pretty good that I didn't allow a negative experience to dictate my choice and my body feels way better now.

Day 77: 5 miles & 40lbs down!

This morning I was supposed to go to a bootcamp open house in Rockville, MD, but instead of my alarm clock being set for 6:15am, it was set for 6:15PM!  When I woke up at 8:30am I was really blown since I was supposed to be there by 7:45am.  No worries though because I was able to sleep a little longer (which was pretty good).

At the gym today, guess what my distance was?  Since you probably won't be able to guess I'll tell you.  Between walking and jogging I did a total of 5 miles.  Really I was done at 3 miles, but I had to push myself to go a little further than normal.  I still did more walking than actual jogging because my hamstring started hurting, but it was still really good.  I was so excited about my distance that the thought of riding the bike overwhelmed me and I just had to do it.  So I got on and started peddling, but soon my excitement turned to pain.  I think the bike is not my friend just yet.  Slimming down a little more is in order so that I don't hurt my womenhood.  I ended up staying on for 10 minutes and rode for 2.5 miles.  After the workout was done I weighed myself and it's official, I'm totally 40lbs. down.

By the way, just as a friendly reminder.........I'm turning into an ATHLETE!!!

Day 76: Week 12 (No QUITTERS Here!)

I have not blogged since last Tuesday.  I think that that is the longest time that I've gone without blogging since I've started.  Not much has happened actually.  Well, this past week was really hard to work out because of my work schedule and my allergies have been absolutely awful.  I mean awful.  There were a couple of days that I didn't want to go to work or do anything, but not working is not an option unless you are seriously ill because if you don't work, you don't eat (I was raised on that principle); and, since I like to eat, I have to work.

Ummmmmm, we are at week 12 of this journey, and you know what week 12 means?  It means that I'm not a quitter!!!!  I have been doing this thing (planning and training to run a marathon) for 12 weeks, which equates to 3 months.  I gotta repeat that, 12 WEEKS.  There have been some weeks filled with mountain top experiences and some weeks filled with horrible valley low experiences.  But whatever the experience, I haven't quit at it.  That means that I have to stop calling myself a master quitter because I'm not that anymore.  Even though I haven't quit at this, I've got to apply the same level of dedication, commitment and passion to other areas of my life as well - like school!

Goals for this week huh?  IDK (I don't know).  I haven't worked out today, but I think that engaging in some physical exercise everyday (for the rest of the week) is mandatory.  I'm sort of apprehensive since I didn't do that much this week.  I'm not sure how it is going to be to try intensifying my routines.  I guess we will just have to see, right?  Also, I want to start jogging outside of the track (starting with my neighborhood first to see how that goes).  So Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday will be "2aDay" Days and Tuesday, Thursday and Friday will be a regular exercise days.  Last thing "I'm An Athleteeeee!!"  Just needed to sort of yell that.